Other-Related Beliefs

Some researchers have studied whether beliefs about partners influence how individu­als perceive and react to conflict. Campbell, Simpson, Boldry, and Rubin (2010) studied dyadic trust, which is the belief that one’s partner is a dependable source of support and comfort especially in difficult times.

Perceiving that a partner is provocative does not always lead to a confrontation. Some individuals hold entity beliefs that reflect their view that human attributes are fixed and not easily changed, whereas others endorse incre­mental beliefs that indicate that human attri­butes are malleable and can change over time (Dweck, Chiu, & Hong, 1995). Individuals who hold incremental beliefs use voice during conflict and especially when angry, whereas those who endorse entity beliefs are less likely to voice their complaints as their anger increased (Kammrath & Dweck, 2006). This may indicate that believing that people cannot change reduces the likelihood of confronta­tion. However, avoidance by “entity theori- est” may belie negative reactions. In a study of adolescent victims of bullying, Yeager, Trzesniewski, Nokelainen, and Dweck (2011) found that believing that traits are fixed was positively related to blaming the bully and experiencing negative self-feelings (e.g., shame) that stimulated a desire for vengeance.

Of course, a key issue is whether trying to change a partner might be effective, and evidence indicates that it may not be. Overall, Fletcher and Simpson (2006) found that indi­viduals were rarely successful at changing their partners in part because their regulation attempts signals to the partners that they are perceived to be deficient and that lowers their relational satisfaction.